


Resynching their hearts

by Makki_my_d



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Chef Kageyama Tobio, Doctor Oikawa Tooru, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Ex volleyball player Kageyama Tobio, Firefighter Iwaizumi Hajime, Fluff and Angst, Grief/Mourning, Homophobia, I hate iwa only being portrayed as the 'mom' and so does iwa, Ill probably add more tags as we go, M/M, Polyamory, They love each other so much istg, They're like 28/30 ish???
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-17 20:22:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29847003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Makki_my_d/pseuds/Makki_my_d
Summary: They live together, breathe together and love together, yet somehow along the way, insecurities, secrets and lies embedded themselves into every nook and cranny of their relationship.Hearts that used to beat one way, now have a whole new rhythm, and it's up to them to either match that rhythm or help it find it's way back home.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Kageyama Tobio, Iwaizumi Hajime/Kageyama Tobio/Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kageyama Tobio/Oikawa Tooru, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 77





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I noticed a lack of adult life IwaOiKage fics and I just wanna indulge myself tbh.
> 
> Dont be surprised if this suddenly disappears at one point though because I might rewrite this chapter idk, but I do wanna continue this multific so I guess we'll see how that goes.
> 
> This ain't gonna be all sunshine and rainbows so if you like smooth sailing and endless amounts of fluff then this probably isn't for you.
> 
> I just love all three of them so much ngl so yeah... enjoy???

The subtle creak of the front door wasn't something deathly annoying, but rather the task itself to fix it drove more irritation into Iwaizumi's blood. It was one of those things he had always meant to get around to doing, and although it didn't specifically fall onto just him, his partners adamantly swore that they couldn't hear anything, so naturally, it was left to him.

Not that that itself had gotten the door fixed, but it was a start. 

His coat was roughly hung by the door. In his morning rush he'd missed the weather report so opted for the safe option of taking a coat, wildly overestimating the dregs of winter air that were slowly dissipating. It had frustrated him in his commute to work as he lugged around his coat. 

He made a mental note to purchase a new pair of shoes, seeing the fraying heel of his current ones as he scraped them off of his feet using his other shoe. He placed them next to the pair already waiting there, appearing to have been haphazardly removed. 

The early evening filtered through the large window in the living room, colouring the apartment in a burnt orange. He didn't really want to ruin the beautiful hues the setting sun had blessed the walls with, so chose to keep the lights off until darkness settled in a bit more. 

Iwaizumi dropped his bag at the entryway, continuing on into the apartment before stopping.

He turned.

Took a double take at the shoes.

The pair that had been there awaiting his arrival.

That wasn't right. It was the typical routine that he'd be the first home, would search through the fridge for whatever groceries they had and then start on preparing the dinner until his partners began to filter home. That had been the routine for the past five months or so and while it wasn't an anomaly for a routine to be broken, this one had felt so fixed and set in stone that just staring at that extra pair of shoes unnerved him. 

With vigar, he paced into the living room, subsequently checking the adjoined kitchen for any signs of life, finding both untouched since he'd seen them that morning. Logically there were only two rooms in which would be the most likely to check next, but he hadn't heard any movement from the bathroom so naturally, he moved to the bedroom, creaking the door open to peer his head in.

Of course, in the glowing tinge of the brassy room, nestled deep in the covers of their shared bed, the head of sleek, black hair laid splayed across the cotton pillow. It was a peaceful sight really; his partner's face turned away from the window as the blinds drew golden streaks across the bed that were simply too calming to the eye for Iwaizumi not to sigh in content.

Iwaizumi approached, keeping his steps as light as possible until he settled on the edge of the bed. The temptation to brush away the locks hanging in the man's eyes physically hurt to push down. It was now that he was closer that he could really see the dark bags, blotching with purples under his partner's eyes, only enhanced by the dark shadows of the room. 

_Were those there this morning?_

He almost laughed at the trademark Kageyama scowl still resting on the man's face even as he slept– a little frown playing on his own face at the lack of a peaceful expression on the other even in such a relaxed state. 

His hand hesitated as it stilled over Kageyama's bangs, deep, easy breaths filling the room. He so desperately wanted to lower his hand, glide silky locks through his fingers and comb them back–

Startled, Iwaizumi jumped at the shrill alarm blaring from the cubby of the headboard, spotting Kageyama's phone vibrating against the wood to create an even more infuriating storm of sounds.

Every word in the book was cursing the world for the disruption of tranquility. He could only hope that he'd switched off the alarm quick enough to avoid his partner rousing from his slumber. Curse the world once more when a deep groan emitted from the sheets as they moved, curving with Kageyama's stirring body. 

"Hajime?" Kageyama's croaky voice, thick with sleep rumbled from the bed, eyes that were just starting to adjust from the foggy haze of sleep widened. "Shit! I wanted to wake up before you got home. I'm sorry." The genuine guilt flowing off of the man in waves was enough to bring a little smile to Iwaizumi's face, settling his hand in Kageyama's hair.

"Dont worry about it, I'm home a little earlier than usual anyway. Barely any traffic." Iwaizumi oddly felt like an owner petting their cat as Kageyama practically purred next to him. He took the chance to shift a little closer on the bed, resting his back against the headboard as his legs stretched out in front of him. "Why are you home so early though? You're not usually too much later than me, but you look like you've been sleeping for a while." 

Kageyama only grunted in response which had Iwaizumi chuckling through his worry. 

"Tobio, what happened?" He asked, voice trained over the years to hold the perfect balance of soft and firm when the situation required it. Kageyama did mumble something in reply, but it was clear he'd purposefully spoken into the sheets. Iwaizumi stilled his hand, then opted to remove it altogether, crossing them over his chest. 

It was obvious from the grunt that Kageyama didn't like the ultimatum he'd been silently given, huffing a few more times for affect before grumbling out a quiet but intelligible, "sent me home."

Iwaizumi settled his hand back on Kageyama's head, but refrained from combing through the messing mop under his palm again. He needed more than _that_.

"Why did they send you home?" The other had a habit of only giving brief details of a situation then relied on hope that it wasn't pressed any further. Nine years of knowing each other and six being in a relationship was enough for Iwaizumi to learn how to push through that.

"Said I looked tired," Kageyama shrugged, crinkling the soft covers as he did so. 

"Were you tired?" 

No response.

"Tobio."

Kageyama sat up, pressing his back against the headboard with more force than necessary. "I could have still worked."

Iwaizumi pinched the bridge of his nose. "Clearly you couldn't." Frustration drew jagged lines across his forehead at Kageyama's persistence. He dared a look at the man besides him, a sigh expelling from his lungs instantly and eyes softening. "It's nothing to feel bad over. You've never missed a day since working there and I'm sure they were just worried about you," he curled his hand into Kageyama's which was lying lifelessly between them, shame coating the younger's face. "You don't have to work if you don't feel up to it. Don't push yourself like that." 

His hand tightened around Kageyama's, a silent plea in the action. It was met with a lethargic grip back, but it was still a response and Iwaizumi would take it. 

"Are you still tired?"

The question stretched a silence so long, Iwaizumi was contemplating whether Kageyama really wasn't going to respond this time. The agitated huff bubbling in his through was forced back down when a heavy head rested on his shoulder, feeling the movements of a nod. 

Iwaizumi nodded in return before getting off the bed figuring he might as well join Kageyama; quickly changing out of his work clothes and into something far more comfortable. A smile tugged at his lips at the eyes he could feel following his every movement. 

Kageyama's body, which was still cocooned in the confines of the thick sheets, was promptly joined by Iwaizumi's. 

"Sleep," he whispered into the air, unintentionally also following the command almost instantly. 

—————————————

Iwaizumi didn't know how long he'd drifted off for, but from what he could see upon opening his eyes was, firstly that it was long enough for the calming evening rays to have diminished in the dark sky, and secondly for their third partner to have arrived back home. 

It was a wonderful sight, and one he was sure he'd never get bored of upon waking up to tufts of gorgeous brown hair peering down at them with a face of pure adoration and a little bit of. What was that? Longing? He didn't know, but he didn't want it there any longer.

"Welcome home," he whispered, careful not to wake Kageyama. Oikawa's eyes moved to him from the man he'd been silently cooing at. Oikawa smiled, kneeling down besides the bed to rest his arms on the covers and flicking on the small light attached to their headboard. As he was leaning up, Iwaizumi took the opportunity to intercept, and although the angle was a little awkward, they still made it work for the kiss. 

"My boys look so snug. Iwa-chan is such a good pillow." Iwaizumi concluded Oikawa couldnt have been home long, seeing the brunette still dressed in his typical slacks and shirt, sleeves bunched up at his elbows. His tie had been removed and most likely tossed somewhere one of them would find it in two or three weeks and he could only hope that Oikawa had put his ID somewhere he remembered, knowing how many mornings were spent rushing about trying to find it.

Oikawa had a tight expression on his face as he gazed at Kageyama. "Is he okay?" 

Of course nothing would get past Oikawa. The man was practically a walking encyclopedia of both him and Kageyama. It both comforted him and scared him to some extent. 

Sighing, Iwaizumi joined Oikawa in observing the sleeping man beside him. 

"Apparently he was sent home from work. When I got home he was still asleep, although I think he wanted to wake up before I got back so I'm not sure whether that was to greet me or to make it seem as if nothing was wrong. Makes me wonder whether this is the first time this has happened." That was the worrying thought wasn't it? That Kageyama had kept something like that from them. He knew he couldn't let the passing thought fester into a full blown accusation, but he was worried, and it was just so hard not to let his mind wander. 

"We can't assume, but I get where you're coming from and it isn't a far fetched idea considering it's him." Oikawa frowned. "We just have to trust him."

Iwaizumi knew that what Oikawa was saying was right, and he did trust Kageyama, but he just wished the younger would invite them into his head a little more often. Because it was frustrating when Kageyama closed himself off and kept everything inside, bottling it up until it inevitably spilled out and created a mess the three of them would clean up together. But that's what they did. They'd made a promise to be with each other through thick and thin, all the messy parts combined and so far they had never once broken that promise.

Oikawa sighed next to him and Iwaizumi too the time to take in a good look at the man's appearance and –as if the dark circles under Kageyama's eyes weren't enough to churn his gut with anxiety– the exhausted sag of Oikawa's eyes was enough for Iwaizumi to figure that Oikawa most likely hadn't had the most stress free of days. 

"Do you want takeout tonight?" Iwaizumi asked. The instant relief shone on Oikawa's face in the form of a grateful smile. 

"That would be amazing." Oikawa promptly fished out his phone to make the order. His shuffling had caused his wrist to raise itself to Iwaizumi's eye level, the time on the watch glistening his face in shock.

"Eight-thirty!?" He whisper-shouted as to not wake Kageyama and moved to sit up in the bed, "why are you home so late?" While it wasn't necessarily an uncommon occurrence for Oikawa to arrive home late, it usually didn't stretch _that_ far.

Oikawa groaned, although apparently didn't deem the conversation interesting enough to take his eyes off of his phone. "I had a backup of appointments. Apparently all the hypochondriacs were out in full force today. I had one woman who thought she had bowel cancer because her stomach hurt." 

Iwaizumi's eyebrows raised a little. "Did she?" He asked with genuine concern. 

Oikawa snorted, "Iwa-chan is so caring," he crooned, taking his eyes off his phone to send Iwaizumi a mock look of sentiment that was met with an unamused frown. "Fine, fine. To answer your question, no, she did not have bowel cancer," he rolled his eyes back over to his phone. "She was just pregnant," he added nonchalantly, continuing to add more food to the order with hungry eyes.

"Okay, yeah alright. I don't need to know everything."

"She doesn't know who the father is."

"Are you allowed to gossip about your patients?"

"It's between two guys. Mr personal trainer or Mr husband. Personally I'm rooting for Mr personal trainer."

"Why not the husband?" 

"Because he deserves to know she's been cheating on him and this is the perfect way to discover that. It'll be such a scandal."

"I don't know about _perfect_."

"Iwa-chan, you don't watch enough dramas."

"And clearly you watch too many." 

"I'm hoping that they both come along for the ultrasound so I can really get a sense of the tension."

"Knowing you, you'd do some dramatic reveal as to who the father was."

"Naturally."

"You're a menace to society."

"I prefer the term 'asset'."

"I prefer the term 'loud'."

The mumbled addition had Iwaizumi and Oikawa instantly losing what they were discussing. 

"Tobio-chan!" Oikawa instantly took the opportunity of his partner being awake to join the other two on the bed, squeezing between them until Iwaizumi was almost hanging off the side even though there was a fair amount of space laying bare of a good third of the bed. "I'm sorry we woke you, but in all honesty I wasn't sure how much longer I could have waited to join in." He made his point by snuggling himself under the covers as far as he could go.

Oikawa's phone was closed where it lay, discarded amongst the fluffy confines of the bed, so Iwaizumi presumed Oikawa had finished the order for the three of them. It meant that Iwaizumi could turn his full attention on his two partners cuddling up beside him. 

"You're gonna crinkle your shirt," Iwaizumi warned, already seeing a few creases form in the crisp white material. Oikawa hummed in reply, making no effort to get up and change. "You're ironing it then." Oikawa grunted in dismissal to that one, not happy with that one bit, but didn't put up much of a fight, too content to care in that moment.

They all remained cuddled up in bed until the doorbell rang, both Oikawa and Kageyama voting for Iwaizumi to be the one banished from the bed to retrieve their food. He wasn't pleased with that particular decision, and made that known on his face, but knowing he was unable to say no to Oikawa and Kageyama's puppy dog eyes, the two made sure to exceed themselves this time. 

Iwaizumi turned the heating up on the way to the front door, the cold air nipping at his freshly exposed skin. That was one of the reasons he hated naps, he just always got so cold after them.

He ignored the creak of the door as it opened to reveal the delivery boy they had seen probably too many times before; his name a completely foreign concept to them though. He felt a little bad not being able to greet the boy in a completely polite manner, although the boy had a somewhat irritated pull to his face, so a polite interaction of any sorts was probably out of the window.

As he looked down, he could justify the boy's face. He'd had to carry up three bags of food up thirteen flights of stairs, most likely cursing the building's maintenance for the elevator being out of order the entire time. 

Iwaizumi initially thought that the other two bags must be for one of their neighbours that coincidentally ordered at the same time they did, but as the boy proceeded to hand over _all three bags_ , Iwaizumi could only stand wooden as he passively accepted them.

"You got a party or something going on?" The boy asked, or more like hissed as he peered over Iwaizumi's shoulder to look inside. Iwaizumi couldn't exactly blame him, but he wasnt exactly on board with the rude interaction. 

Iwaizumi chuckled awkwardly, "something like that." It was easier to lie than have to explain that all that food was only for just three people. The boy didn't waste time in stomping off, nursing his shoulder as he went. The bags _were heavy_ , even for Iwaizumi and that was saying something. 

Closing the door with his foot, Iwaizumi headed to the kitchen to haul the bags onto the kitchen island, hearing light steps follow him as he did.

"Woah." Kageyama ogled the hefty bags that he stopped short of in awe. "Why did you order so much?" 

"That's what I'd like to know. Where is he?" Iwaizumi looked around the corner and down the hall in order to spot their third partner, finding no one else in sight.

"Bedroom. Getting changed." Kageyama supplied, collecting some plates and cutlery before setting them down on the table. 

Soon after, a click of a door and skipped steps entered the kitchen. 

"Ooh goody, we got everything." Oikawa clapped his hands, now wearing joggers that were a little short of his ankles (must be Iwaizumi's) and a tshirt that had been passed around the three of them so much, the original owner of it was lost to them.

"Why the hell did you order so much? I'm pretty sure the delivery guy is gonna need physical therapy after carrying our seven course meal up those stairs. He was about five seconds away from murdering me."

Oikawa laughed, waving off Iwaizumi's dramatics. "Silly Iwa-chan, we're not eating all of this now. I thought we could order some more and take it into work for tomorrow. I dont think any of us are really in the mood to prepare anything so this was my ingenious solution." He opened his arms, gesturing to the buffet in front of them, a pleased smile on his face as if this was his proudest accomplishment to date.

Iwaizumi frowned. It made a lot of sense and now he felt a little embarrassed about questioning it, and a little bashful that Oikawa had been thoughtful in a way, leaving them with a relaxing evening and not having to worry about that added chore. It was smart.

Didn't mean Iwaizumi had to admit it.

"We're gonna go bankrupt," was all he supplied. Oikawa's smile didnt falter as he helped Iwaizumi unpack the food, setting some of it aside to put into the fridge for the following day. Kageyama had already sorted out drinks for them, having opened a bottle of wine Oikawa was already blessing the sight of. 

As they began to dig into their food, Kageyama broke the comfortable silence. "Oh, Tooru, your mom called earlier just after I got in. She asked if you could call her back." 

Oikawa hummed in reply, not offering much more, but Kageyama didnt seem fazed by it. Iwaizumi however, was not oblivious to the thick tension on Oikawa's shoulder, or the way the brunette tightened his fingers around his chopsticks hard enough Iwaizumi swore he could hear them splinter.

Eggshells scattered on the floor and Iwaizumi didnt dare take a step.

They ate in relative silence after that; not uncomfortable, but not comfortable at the same time. Iwaizumi filled most of the conversation, indulging Kageyama more tyan he did Oikawa. Occasionally Oikawa would chime in, but it was far less than he usually would. 

Oikawa opted to wash up after, delving into the solo task. He wanted to be doing something and alone for that matter. Iwaizumi and Kageyama left him to it, settling on the couch while Oikawa scrubbed the sins off of the plates. 

Kageyama was flicking through the channels when Oikawa's voice, laced with something akin to anger, called out from the kitchen.

"Tobio!" Oikawa had a dangerous look in his eyes as he met Kageyama from across the room, fridge door open at his side. "What have I said before about putting empty cartons back in the fridge?" It was now that Kageyama saw the bottle furiously grasped in Oikawa's hand. 

"Sorry," he said as he turned back to the tv, thinking the conversation was done. Evidently, it wasnt.

"Don't apologise if you're just going to do it again." Oikawa punctuated his words by slamming the fridge door closed. Kageyama reared up in his seat, feeling Iwaizumi do the same from next to him. 

If what Oikawa had said earlier was anything to go by, he clearly wasn't in any mood to be taking little things like that lightly, and with the call from his mother, Iwaizumi could tell Oikawa was giving into his emotions. That was paired with the fact that both Kageyama and Oikawa had a fair amount of wine over dinner if the now near empty bottle was anything to go by. He didn't think it was entirely fair he was taking it out on Kageyama, but he wouldn't exactly say Oikawa was in the right headspace to conclude that he was doing it on purpose.

Oikawa was picking a fight, and unfortunately, Kageyama was on the receiving end.

They didn't need to fight right now, that would just make the situation worse. Oikawa would calm down and then everything would go back to normal.

Kageyama didn't seem to get the memo.

"Where the hell was I supposed to put it?" He countered, obviously not pleased with the way he was being talked to.

Oikawa scoffed, "the bin perhaps," he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"There wasn't a bin bag in it."

"Then put one in!"

"I was in a rush!"

"Because you're terrible at time management."

"At least I don't waste half my life in the bathroom."

"God, you're such a fucking child!"

Now Iwaizumi could tell the argument,ent was veering off, and would soon cover more ground than either of them could keep up with apologising for. He internally sighed, finding the job of the mediator falling to him _yet again_.

The need to defend Kageyama rose. Kageyama wasn't a child. He was tired and stressed and impossibly frustrated a lot of the time, and to Iwaizumi, calling him a child was simply an easy scapegoat for Oikawa to release any pent up frustration. 

Yet, at the same time, he knew that Kageyama knew he shouldn't be pushing at Oikawa's buttons, always seeming to give into the temptation of defending himself to a level that resided at _'you get as good as you give'_. Kageyama had a habit of matching the intensity that Oikawa set and running with it. 

This was an argument between two tired individuals who often acted on impulsive emotions, and who knew what regrettable consequences would entail if he let it go on any longer. 

God, he really hated being the middleman.

"That's enough! You two are grown adults and you're squabbling like a pair of fucking teenagers!" That time, Iwaizumi received a scoff from the both of them, both still caught up in glaring daggers into each other's souls. "Seriously, it's a carton of juice. Stop blowing everything out of proportion, for fuck sake." Iwaizumi stood up, walking over to Oikawa and snatching the carton from his hands before taking out a bag to line the bin, and throwing the bottle in with it.

Iwaizumi was met with no verbal response, only the puff of the sofa cushions Kageyama heavily leant back against and retreating steps, promptly followed by the slam of their bedroom door. 

He sighed, wondering how they had ended up spending most of their time partaking in petty arguments that led them absolutely nowhere. With Kageyama and Oikawa it was almost constant. Iwaizumi did not often fight with Kageyama and he was pointedly avoiding fighting with Oikawa right now. 

Oikawa was impulsive; said what was on his mind and while that was good for communication regarding their relationship, he needed to get his tone in check sometimes.

"I really didn't mean to leave it in there," Kageyama broke silence left behind in Oikawa's wake, his voice muffled by his hand covering his face. "I was gonna throw it out when I got home, but I completely forgot."

"I know you didn't do it on purpose, it's okay Tobs." 

"I just hate when he talks to me like that."

"I know."

_So much for their relaxing evening_ , Iwaizumi thought bitterly. "I'll go talk to him."

Kageyama didn't remove his hands from his face, only nodding to regard Iwaizumi that he'd heard. 

Iwaizumi cranked the heating up a little more as he passed. It was a cold walk to the bedroom after all.

He knocked lightly against the door before entering, finding Oikawa sat on the side of their bed, head in his hands much like a replica of Kageyama in the other room. The bed dipped as Iwaizumi joined Oikawa, leaving the silence open for the man next to him.

Oikawa remained unmoving, basically unbreathing until he whispered out, "I don't want to talk to her."

It had Iwaizumi sighing, staring up to the ceiling in contemplation. "She's hurting as well. Come on Oikawa, she's your mother."

"I don't give a fuck," Oikawa snarled, and Iwaizumi was for once grateful that he wasnt looking into Oikawa's eyes. He didn't think he'd be able to handle whatever he saw.

"Yes, you do." Oikawa didn't reply, but Iwaizumi could sense the anger circling around the room beginning to diminish. 

Oikawa flopped onto the bed, gazing up to the skylight and into the stars. He found himself –not for the first time– grateful they lived on the top floor. "I didn't mean to shout at him." 

Iwaizumi fell back onto the bed next the Oikawa, a fuzziness blooming in his chest at the feeling of long, delicate fingers wrapping around his own. "You don't have to fight about everything." 

"I don't want to!" Oikawa defended. Iwaizumi shot him a look, feeling the argument in Oikawa already growing. The man next to him only huffed, but dropped it nonetheless. "I promise I'll try."

Iwaizumi couldn't help but accept the wave of relief in the air. 

They laid there together in relative silence, before a knock at the door had the both of them sitting up.

Kageyama gingerly entered, closing the door behind him before making his way to stand in front of Oikawa. Both men on the bed stared at Kageyama curiously as the younger of the three kept his eyes connected with Oikawa's.

Without breaking eye contact, Kageyama lowered himself onto one knee, taking Oikawa's hand in his hold and that was enough for Iwaizumi to release a belly full of laughs, watching as Oikawa terribly fought off a smile of his own.

"Oikawa Tooru, I promise from this day forth that I shall _never_ –" the look on Kageyama's face was criminally serious, "–put an empty carton back in the fridge. In sickness and in health." 

The dopey grin draped across Oikawa's lips stretched impossibly fondly. "Until death do us part?" He tilted his head to the side in question. 

Kageyama smiled. "Until death do us part." 

Kageyama was swiftly hauled onto the bed and captured in a bone crushing hug between Oikawa and Iwaizumi. 

As Oikawa peppered Kageyama's face with kisses, firmly holding the squirming man in place, Iwaizumi saw it. The guilt finally urging Oikawa to rectify his words. It was a relief to know Oikawa regretted what he'd said. Iwaizumi still felt a little guilty himself for not having spoken up, but until Oikawa calmed down and realised his mistakes himself, there was almost no getting through to him. 

It was good to know that Oikawa had only been fueled by the vexation of a long day. 

It happened to all of them.

They moved on.

—————————————

"Are you sure you don't want us to come with you?" 

"Iwa-chan, it would make my week if you came with me, but there's gonna be so much going on and there's bound to be another fight. It isn't fair to throw you both into that." 

"It isn't fair that _you_ have to be thrown into that."

"I can handle it. Besides, it's just for the weekend. I'll be back Sunday night." 

Iwaizumi only scowled at the floor as the rhythmic thrum of Oikawa's feet shuffled around the room. His partner disappeared into the closet briefly before returning with yet another bundle of clothes he somehow expected to fit into his already half full overnight bag. 

Wordlessly, Iwaizumi folded the clothes that were unceremoniously dumped on the bed while Oikawa disappeared yet again. 

"We could just stay at a hotel or something. Who's to say we have to stay at the house?" Iwaizumi spoke, unearthing his long forgotten skills at video games from his teenage years to slot the folded fabric into the bag and utilise as much space as possible. 

"My mother's gonna have something to say about that and you know it. Seriously Iwa-chan, I'll be fine. I'll just go and make this completely pointless trip, waste my weekend and have absolutely nothing to show for it once it's over." Oikawa called out from the closet, the distance helping his sarcasm appear more humoured to conceal the dark hiss of his words. 

They lapsed into a tense silence Iwaizumi wasnt sure how to break, until Oikawa reemerged with a smile on his face that was just a little too tight for Iwaizumi's liking, holding yet another bundle of clothes in his arms.

Iwaizumi eyed the growing pile bizarrely, "they're not all gonna fit. What do you even need them all for?" 

Oikawa didn't really have an answer to that which he knew would settle his partner's mind. He just wanted to be moving and doing something to blind his mind from the impending doom of the following day, channeling his festering anxiety into feeling the heavy weight of clothes pressed up against his chest. It was calming, like the sensation of Iwaizumi's chest pushed against his own. 

A soft click of the door and in came Kageyama, having finished cleaning up from dinner. Iwaizumi and Oikawa both waited for the man to say something, lips pursed and eyebrows down turned as if he was deliberating how to word his thoughts. No words were spoken though, they didn't need to be when instead he wrapped his arms around Oikawa from behind, nuzzling his face into his partner's neck.

Oikawa huffed a laugh, overlapping Kageyama's hands on his waist with his own. "Look Iwa-chan. You've always wanted a puppy, and now we've got one. He's a hefty fella though, so you'll be cleaning up after him," Oikawa teased, feeling the man behind him chuckle before seemingly remembering the jab was aimed at him and promptly grunting in fake annoyance. 

"Do you really have to go? This is the third time in two months." Oikawa almost caved at the pure pleading tone of Kageyama's voice, all too similar to Iwaizumi's when he'd announced that he had to go home for the weekend in the first place a few days ago when he finally returned his mother's call. 

"Afraid so, but how about next weekend we all go have a date night or something. Oh we haven't done a date night in so long." A beaming smile grew on Oikawa's face at his revolutionary idea, promptly followed by both his partners also perking up.

In truth, none of them could specifically remember the last time they had all gone out together. They knew it wasn't drastically that long ago, maybe a month or two, but they would all agree it was certainly long overdue. 

"What if you have to go back again next weekend?" Kageyama voiced his concerns, holding back on letting himself get too hopeful. 

"Then I'll put my foot down, I promise. Nothing gets in the way of date night." They all decided not to voice the fact that things had obviously gotten in the way before for them to have stretched their dry period of romantic outings recently. 

Iwaizumi sent Oikawa a smile, small and fond. Beautiful. "Okay, yeah. We'll go out next weekend then." It made the upcoming days a little less daunting knowing they had something to look forward to once it was all over. 

However, there was still the subject at hand to deal with. 

"Sweetheart, I have to pack," Oikawa chuckled past the disappointment of having to leave when Kageyama made no move to unlatch himself. 

After a few more lingering seconds, Kageyama did in fact let go, but –much to Oikawa's seething annoyance– made a point to _straddle_ Iwaizumi on the bed instead. Oikawa's face heated at the un-broken eye contact between him and Kageyama at the action, paired with the mischievous smirk taught on the younger's face.

Iwaizumi was lapping it up– _literally_. He brought Kageyama a little closer, fully divulging into the situation as he watched Oikawa follow their movements with predatory eyes. 

"I thought you had some packing to do," Iwaizumi taunted to his unbreathing partner as he proceeded to stroke up Kageyama's back, making a show of dipping his hand under the fabric just in the slightest. He tilted his neck to give better access when the younger started to press a line of kisses just under his jaw.

Oikawa swallowed at the sight. 

more clothes were added to the pile; packing forgotten. 

—————————————

Oikawa made his way down to the garage after having left his two sleeping partners in the confines of the apartment, guilt having held him back from waking them to bid a proper farewell in the bitter morning air. He'd left a note with the promise he'd message as soon as he arrived and as frequently as possible while he was there, though he was positive Kageyama would be spamming him the entire stay with photos of whatever animals he could see from the balcony.

It was a nervous habit Kageyama had picked up at some point in his life. Usually he was the driest texter imaginable, yet overexerted himself in the task when anxious for whoever he was messaging. It seemed he was simply desperate to keep in contact and Iwaizumi and Oikawa found that there really was no limit or category the man would restrict himself to, although animal watching did appear to be the most frequently recurring theme. It was adorable and would not be unwelcome in the slightest. 

Oikawa would need to hold onto every strand of contact he had with his partners if he wanted to survive the weekend. 

The lights of his car flashed as he pressed the button on the keys, swiftly hauling his bag into the back of the car and instantly turning the heating up as soon as he was situated in his seat. 

It took a little jiffling to get the seat just right. He guessed Iwaizumi had been the one to use it last considering how far forward it was. Oikawa had stated to his partner countless times before that he may as well just _sit on_ the wheel, to which he'd always receive the gruff reply that it was just comfier to be sat like that. 

_Comfy my ass_ , Oikawa thought as he could feel his kneecaps begin to bruise from where they were squashed against the dashboard. 

With a click and a flourish, the seat was finally comfortable when his legs were no longer at risk of cramping or kneeling himself in the face. 

He sighed, taking a moment to rest his head against the wheel, drinking in the scent of leather under his nose. 

Turning on the ignition, he didn't allow himself to think, singularly focusing on every conscious element of driving that he could. The thought of his partners, most likely still curled up together flashed through his mind as he left the garage; away from the warmth and love they carried with them, and on his way to plan his father's funeral.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can we all just collectively agree that chapter one was was just terrible, yet I cant for the life of me be bothered to change it so we're just gonna leave it there, but ignore it. Sounds good.

Whatever mindless show was sounding from the tv was lost to the suffocating silence of the room. The men twitching nervously on the couch flicked their eyes to the clock only to find that a mere minute had passed from their last glance. 

11:34

The apartment felt so bare and lifeless, only two beating hearts awaiting their third were the only sign of living life. No one moved, they only waited. 

They looked to the clock again; two minutes had passed this time, but it may as well have been an hour, an eternity even. Like with many things they were discovering, time was yet another curse out of their control.

The front door creaked, Iwaizumi's ears pricking at the microscopic sound. He nudged Kageyama, who had his legs settled on Iwaizumi's lap as he drifted in and out of sleep, desperately attempting to succeed in staying awake. 

Kageyama drew his sleepy eyes over to Iwaizumi in question, the latter only nodding his head to the door in answer, doing the trick as the younger proceeded to sit up straighter, rubbing the tiredness from his eyes. 

Shuffling could be heard from the entryway, and Iwaizumi gulped nervously at the sound of shoes being thrown down with rather a lot of force. He poked at Kageyama's shoulder to get the man moving towards the door, both rounding the corner at the same time.

It was a sight that's for sure.

Oikawa looked terrible. Hair disheveled and flat having lost it's natural spring just like the one in the man's step. Slouched shoulders were connoting an odd mixture of defeat and relief. The smooth skin around Oikawa's pristine nails were picked raw at the edges and Iwaizumi just wanted to take each individual finger and kiss them until they were healed. 

It hurt to see their partner like that. It hurt like hell. 

Oikawa had been messaging with them frequently over the Saturday, but come Sunday morning he'd gone somewhat radio silent, only giving them a rough time he'd be back and not much more. A rough time he was currently four hours over.

Kageyama was the first to reach out, having spotted the older's viciously mauled fingertips and took them in his own, giving them a squeeze. Oikawa made no indication he even knew they were in front of him, just continuing to stare blankly at the floor. It was only when Iwaizumi sucked in a breath to speak that Oikawa's voice, heartbreakingly small and devoid of _anything_ , reached their ears.

"I want to go to bed." It was clear Oikawa was on the verge of spilling his emotions, whether it be a river of tears from his eyes or an outlash that would leave the apartment eerily silent for days. It was even clearer that Oikawa was holding himself back from that with all his strength. 

They hated it, being on a knife's edge and having to think before every step they made in fear of falling and opening up a deep cut they weren't sure they'd be able to close. They hated it, but they would never consider leaving Oikawa on that edge alone. If they went down, they'd do it together. There was no other way. So they nodded and led Oikawa down the hallway to their bedroom, leaving the discarded bag behind. They'd deal with it tomorrow.

Iwaizumi left briefly to make his rounds around the apartment, shutting off all the lights and appliances. When he returned, his partner's were both in bed; Oikawa's front curved perfectly to fit against Kageyama's back, arms hugging the younger's waist as if he never wanted to let go. Oikawa's eyes were closed, but Iwaizumi caught Kageyama's gazing back at him, practically quaking with concern that he was positive he was mirroring. 

Kageyama saw Iwaizumi round the bed before joining, fitting in to hug against Oikawa's back while draping an arm above them on the pillows to rest in Kageyama's hair. 

As they drifted off, Kageyama wasn't sure, but maybe he felt a wetness soak into his back. 

—————————————

A few weeks passed without much of a hitch. Oikawa and Kageyama were getting into fewer fights over trivial matters and Iwaizumi felt as if he could finally breathe without the fear that his next would be followed by him, yet again, having to get in between his partners digging into each other's throats. 

As promised, they'd all gone out for a date night with Oikawa choosing the destination which came in the form of a restaurant neither Iwaizumi or Kageyama could pronounce the name of. It was high end, but Oikawa liked to flaunt his nice things and on that occasion, it came in the form of the two men at his side. 

They ignored all the stares. It was nothing new after all. 

Maybe for one night they could pretend those stares were the byproduct of an internal longing or fascination, rather than a burning fire of disapproval and disgust. 

How they wished.

The night of overdue bonding was a refresher they each needed in their lives. The game of three way footsies under the table was all fun and games, bringing a youthful light to the evening until it came to a screeching halt when Kageyama got a little too over excited and ended up kicking Iwaizumi in the shin. Oikawa couldn't remember the last time he'd laughed so effortlessly.

After that, the eggshells on the apartment floor felt far more spaced out and easier to navigate, allowing the three of them to move a little more freely. 

That was until Thursday night, and Iwaizumi, who was in the stage of preparing to start on dinner, heard the front door slam open, acting as a gateway to allow an aura indignation to flood through with it. 

"I know, but you can't expect me to– mom, mom just listen… mom! Let me talk for a se– yes I know, but it's not fai– ugh." 

Iwaizumi turned the heat down and left the pan to simmer after hearing a resounding thud, finding Oikawa with his head firmly against the wall and his phone up against his ear. Iwaizumi could faintly hear the caller –who he suspected to be Oikawa's mother from what he'd heard– continue to speak on.

Oikawa repositioned the phone against his chest, speaking in a hushed voice to Iwaizumi, "where's Tobio?" 

Iwaizumi blinked at the question, "I asked him to pick up some things on the way home since he was closest to the store, so he's a little late back." 

Nodding, Oikawa sighed, turning back to the call from which his absence had not been noticed. Iwaizumi stepped back into the kitchen to retrieve a bottle of water from the fridge, coming back to find Oikawa humming in answer to whatever one sided conversation was going on. Oikawa took the bottle handed to him with a flicker of a smile to show his gratitude, gulping down most of the bottle in one go.

"Can I just get back to you on it?" He said a little breathlessly into the phone after the water. A sigh of relief was released. "Okay, thank you, yeah. Yes I said I would. Yes, okay, okay. I love you too mom, goodbye." 

"What was that about?" The question was asked cautiously once Iwaizumi knew the call had definitely ended and the screen was dark.

Oikawa scoffed, "she wants Tobio to cater the funeral." 

"What?!" 

"I know," Oikawa returned, slumping against the wall, arms folded over the jacket he was yet to remove. "I'm just glad she called me and not him directly. He'd be caving in seconds." 

Iwaizumi hummed in reply, thinking the situation over in his head as he made his way back into the kitchen, shortly followed by Oikawa. 

"Why doesn't she just hire a catering company?" Iwaizumi got back to work on the food, swatting away his partner's hand when it attempted to swipe at the freshly cut vegetables. Oikawa sat on one of the stools around the island as he nursed his hand.

"Something about 'keeping it in the family'," Oikawa mocked somewhat childishly, drawing a laugh from Iwaizumi. "I said I'd ask Tobio about it, but it's not exactly fair for him."

"What's not fair for me?" 

The occupants of the kitchen both jumped at the new voice, finding Kageyama making his way in with a bag in each hand. Iwaizumi rushed to take them from him, pressing a swift kiss against Kageyama's lips in thanks as Oikawa held a hand over his heart.

"Tobio-chan you scared the shit out of me. We didn't even hear you come in, you're like a goddamn cat." Kageyama only rolled his eyes, amused while starting to pack the food away.

"The front door wasn't closed," he replied simply, turning to the other two as if to turn the statement into a question. 

Oikawa looked the more sheepish out of the two, avoiding the frown Iwaizumi was sending him. "I was very caught up in my call, Iwa-chan. You should have noticed it didn't shut behind me."

Iwaizumi shook his head, mumbling something about getting robbed and something else along the lines of hoping it was those damn toy figurines, to which he had received a rather whiny reply of _"they're collectables Iwa-chan!"_

Kageyama's laugh joined the array of flavours dancing about in the air. "What was it you were talking about when I walked in?" Oikawa immediately shifted into a stance of seriousness upon the previous conversation being revisited.

"So for the funeral, my mom had this ingenious idea that instead of hiring a company to cater for it, she wanted to ask you to do it instead." It was completely ridiculous and downright pointless. She could just as easily hire professionals instead of _his partner_ who she apparently had decided she was entitled to rope into things like this on the spot. 

Kageyama nodded along as if waiting for Oikawa to continue. When he didn't, he simply stated, "okay? What's the problem?" It was his job after all to cook, so he didn't see much harm in the request. She was technically family at the end of the day anyway.

Oikawa gaped a little at him before continuing, "my dad was a pretty well known guy. There's gonna be nearly a hundred people there, Tobio-chan. And she probably won't be hiring anyone besides you to do this job, so you'd be doing it on your own."

Kageyama let out a small 'oh' once Oikawa was finished. He did get along with Oikawa's mother fairly well whenever he saw her and she'd taken an instant, striking interest in his cooking, even before he started doing it professionally. There was a deep desire inside of him to be able to help out as much as possible with Oikawa's family at this pressing time, knowing how hard and sudden Oikawa-san's death had fallen on them. 

He briefly wondered whether Oikawa would be disappointed in him if he turned it down, now fully gauging the size of the job he'd been offered.

"You really don't have to do it if you don't want to Tobs." That time it was Iwaizumi reassuring him, still he shook his head.

"I'll do it, it's fine. I really don't mind." And he really didn't. Sure it would probably drain him for all he had, but he'd be helping them out a good deal, especially Oikawa's mother it seemed.

Iwaizumi stilled at the sudden hostility seeping into the air. 

Oikawa himself sucked in a deep breath, looking away from Kageyama as he muttered a fleeting, "do what you want," before retreating to the living room, leaving behind one very troubled man, and one who was starting to think that this was their new normal. 

—————————————

Feeling as if he'd done something wrong, but not entirely sure what, Kageyama set his sights on working his way back into Oikawa's good books. Iwaizumi had been preoccupied with giving Oikawa space so he didn't exactly want to bother the man by asking for help. 

Iwaizumi and Oikawa just seemed to get each other, but Kageyama supposed that was only natural considering they grew up together. He was wistful at times, imagining what it would have been like if only he had met the two earlier than he did, often falling into a deep spiral of wonderment as to what would be different and whether he'd be able to read Oikawa just as well as Iwaizumi could and vice versa. Maybe then he'd be able to finally solve the puzzle that was Oikawa Tooru. 

It was all in vain he always found. He couldn't rewind time, no matter how many times he'd replay those fantasies on loop.

So, he was left to attempt to figure out for himself what exactly he'd done or said that had caused Oikawa to avoid him for the past couple of days.

Of course he could think of plenty of things that he'd done to piss off Oikawa, but none of which correlated with the timeline of Oikawa giving him the cold shoulder.

He hadn't really noticed at first since Oikawa had been talking to him perfectly fine, but soon the small acts of avoidance gradually unearthed themselves, ranging from ruffling his hair in greeting rather than a kiss, to latching onto Iwaizumi throughout the entire night when he did eventually join them in bed. Sometimes he felt a little stupid for overthinking everything, but there was just a churn in his gut, too strong to ignore.

It was getting progressively harder for Kageyama to sleep, as if he didn't already find it difficult; his brain whirring constantly, looking for any indication as to what he'd done or how he could make up for it. Usually Iwaizumi would resettle the peace, but he couldn't exactly outwardly ask the man to do that, he usually did it so naturally and effortlessly, but this would feel too forced and probably wouldn't solve a single thing. 

Kageyama looked over to the clock on their night stand, eyes far too awake for the time glaring back at him. He had one arm draped over Iwaizumi's waist, who was fast asleep next to him, breathing heavily but not quite snoring. Peering over the man, Kageyama realised the rest of the bed still remained as empty, barren land. He hadn't heard Oikawa come in and he was positive he hadn't drifted off, but he found when he delved deep into his mind that sometimes the events around him became a little lost and hazy so he missed little things like that. 

The coil in his gut tightened a little more, releasing a poison of nervousness and uncertainty. 

Delicately, the arm over his waist was gently removed and laid flat on the space he'd gotten up from. Iwaizumi groaned in his sleep, but seemed to settle back quickly, completely unaware of the man padding away from the bed and out the door.

Throwing on a hoodie that was draped over a chair, Kageyama left Iwaizumi alone in the room to sleep, starting down the hallway to find Oikawa. Peeking into their guest bedroom, he thankfully found that unoccupied, not thinking he'd be able to bear Oikawa deciding he didn't even want to sleep in the same room as him anymore.

There was a faint, blue light illuminating the areas around the couch as he entered the living room– there, Kageyama found his partner, legs propped up on the coffee table and laptop residing on his lap. He could only see the back of Oikawa's head, neck craned down and trained on the screen in front of him. The sound emitting from the laptop was hard to decipher from the entrance way, and it was only when Kageyama softly approached that the noise became eligible. 

_"–nother service ace by Kageyama Tobio! That brings the score up to 15-24. Will this next serve be the finishing blow for the opposing team? He truly is on top form today!"_

Kageyama froze; mind being sucked into a whirling pool of nostalgia and yearning, he didn't even register that his foot had settled on a creaky segment of wood. 

The room plunged into darkness, cutting off the enthusiastic cheers that erupted from the crowd on screen.

Kageyama's eyes had not moved, so when Oikawa flicked on the lamp besides him, he found himself staring blankly at the now closed laptop, only noting Oikawa's alert figure from the corner of his eye, like a deer caught in the headlights of a truck approaching at an unfathomable speed. 

Oikawa laughed humorlessly and painfully forced. "We're really gonna have to start putting a bell on you or something," he attempted to joke. Neither of them laughed.

Kageyama finally looked up from the laptop to meet Oikawa's eyes, which were shifting around the room as if it was a desperate attempt to quickly find something else to draw the younger's attention to. 

"You, uh…" Kageyama started and Oikawa's eyes finally stopped moving, fixing on him, waiting for him to continue. "You didn't come to bed." The elephant in the room blatantly ignored. Kageyama certainly didn't want to address it. 

A nervous but relieved chuckle filled the room. "I had some work to do, but I guess I lost track of time. Couldn't sleep?" Kageyama only shook his head in reply, moving to join the other on the sofa. Oikawa opened his laptop back up, quickly clicking off the tab it opened up to.

"What's the work?" Kageyama asked, draping the blanket folded over the back of the couch to cover them both.

Oikawa hummed, loading up a page filled with technical terms Kageyama had never even heard of before. "There's this patient at the hospital and the case is a little strange so I was doing some extra research for it. Apparently there's a doctor in Switzerland who's written about something similar." 

Even without understanding even a quarter of what was written, Kageyama still silently read over the article with Oikawa. There was a little space between them and like a magnet, Kageyama was simply drawn to the man next to him, gradually closing the gap before their shoulders touched. What he did not like was how Oikawa tensed, but what he hated even more was when he made to place his hand over Oikawa's, the latter moving it to scroll down the screen just before they touched.

Kageyama wanted to scream. Scream at himself for having caused this rift, scream at Oikawa for not _telling him_ what the hell he'd done, and just scream at the world in general. He just wanted everything back to normal, even willing to compromise for just a sliver of normality.

The twitch of his hand took his mind to the bottom draw of the desk in the guest bedroom. Hidden behind clutter was the only thing he could think of that would lift the anxiety resting heavily on his chest, but Oikawa was here and Oikawa couldn't find out so he guessed that the weight would have to stay there, slowly suffocating him.

Desperation funneled down his throat and straight into his heart. 

"Tooru," the name was the first thing to slip from his lips, only earning a small hum in regards, but nothing more. "You know I love you, right?" Kageyama cringed at how insecure that sounded, but he had never been good at masking his emotions like Oikawa could; much like now when Oikawa snapped his head up, gazing over his features with such an unreadable and impassive face that it genuinely terrified Kageyama as to how he could do it. 

The urge to squirm under Oikawa's analysing eyes was pushed away, forcing himself to remain still as the brunette continued to search for _something_. Kageyama had no idea what, but all he could do was hope that whatever it was, it was good.

And then the most wonderful thing happened. Oikawa smiled, and then he laughed and he shook his head, grabbing Kageyama's hand and bringing the knuckles up to his lips tenderly. A ripple of joy sped through his body at the action, so delicate and meaningful that it made Kageyama feel as if he'd been handed the world.

Maybe he had.

"I know, Tobio-chan. I love you too. So much." Those words came with a buzz, electrifying and phenomenal, sending sparks in the air that ignited a smile on Kageyama's face. A smile that instantly enchanted Oikawa's lips to draw near, ghosting over the chapped pair before rising to the younger's forehead, then down his cheeks, each one like a brush over porcelain.

Impatience grew in Kageyama when Oikawa's lips would inch so close to his lips, only to breeze past and explore another expanse of his skin. A little flicker of doubt emerged that Oikawa may be minutely avoiding him again, but by the devilish grin on the brunette's face, he absolutely knew what he was doing, prompting Kageyama to cup the cheeks of his partner, gazing devotingly into beautiful hazel eyes before closing the gap himself, kissing that grin right off of Oikawa's face. 

Oikawa kissed back feverishly, as if he'd been itching to grab the other's face and bring their lips together, much like Kageyama had.

"Tobio," Oikawa breathed, closing the lid of his laptop without looking and sliding it onto the table. He brought Kageyama closer, wrapping his arms over the man's slightly boney shoulders, remembering when they'd once been bulked up with muscle, much like Iwaizumi's. Just the thought had him mentally drooling, having to thank Kageyama's sweet aroma in the junction of his neck to ground Oikawa as he nuzzled in. 

It was difficult to remember in moments like these, how much doubt had planted itself in Kageyama's mind, unsure as to whether those weeds had been pulled out by the roots, or simply cut off at the head, ready to sprout back up again. 

With Oikawa in his hold, Kageyama's gaze was drawn to the wall behind the brunette, the large window overlooking the city being framed in by a scattering of photographs. Some were noticeably older than others, depicting a much younger version of his two partners, posing together for the camera, while in others, they remained completely ignorant to the camera on them, capturing a moment of raw authenticity and realism. Those were his favourites.

Others mapped out the timeline of their relationship. The stages of Oikawa, Iwaizumi _and then_ Kageyama on the sidelines, before melding into much more when they dipped a toe into the relationship, then cannon balling and becoming Oikawa, Iwaizumi _and_ Kageyama. 

Some were a little harder to look at. Glaring memories of old friends and passions lost a long time ago still left a fleeting sorrow, overlooking their everyday lives as if they deserved to be there, like they were still there outside the 2D image. Kageyama pondered whether they were all masochists for keeping them up there, reminding them of what they'd lost.

"We should go on another trip," Kageyama abruptly murmured into the open air, now eyeing the frames homing the many adventures they'd delved into in their early twenties, dwindling into occasional trips with every passing year. 

Oikawa shifted, turning to follow Kageyama's eyeline to the wall. "That would be nice." Both noted it wasn't a promise nor was it a commitment to go, because there was a reason they'd given their inner travellers a backseat. 

It was how every conversation went whenever one of them brought up going on another trip. The initial idea was tempting and exciting enough to rear a spontaneous agreement, then life would eclipse those plans and the cycle would repeat again. 

Staring at the photos had caused a tiredness to seep into Oikawa's body, cringing at the time plastered on the clock on the wall. He'd maybe get five hours sleep before work if he hit the hay now. 

"C'mon champ, Iwa-chan is probably all lonely in there without his gorgeous companions to spoon him." Swatting at Kageyama's thigh to get him standing, Oikawa slipped his laptop into his bag for the next day. Of course Iwaizumi would never admit he loved being spooned, but there were certain things the man was just too obvious about. 

"Hajime's asleep," the other replied simply, receiving a little scoff in return. 

"Just come on," Oikawa dragged out his words, latching onto Kageyama's hand and tugging him back to the bedroom.

As they both scooted under the covers, muffling their laughs at Iwaizumi's soft grunts in his sleep at being shifted, Kageyama could only lie awake pondering one thing.

He still had absolutely no idea what he'd done. 

—————————————

"You look troubled," a coworker of Iwaizumi's –Kiyoko– abruptly said upon arrival back at the station. A few members of their squad had been called out to a kitchen fire; nothing they'd never dealt with before and thankfully there were no casualties or injuries, so the situation was left with the police once they'd extinguished the flames. 

Iwaizumi hummed, not fully understanding what Kiyoko was grasping at. She'd always been the quiet yet observant type, only bringing up topics when she couldn't come to a solid conclusion of her own in her mind. She was smart, not much getting past her, so it caused a hesitation in Iwaizumi in regards to answering. Hell, he didn't really know the answer himself.

She sighed lightly, "you've been frowning a lot more recently, but not that usual frown you always wear." Just for good measure, he frowned at that comment. "It's like the one you get whenever you get stuck on those crossword puzzles. Y'know the ones that make you look like an old man," Kiyoko teased, although didn't dwindle down the concern in her voice. 

"I'm not an old man."

"You're one pair of reading glasses away from the whole station calling you 'Grandpa'."

"Shut up," he replied, no heat to his words and even chuckling a little as he said it.

They jumped out of the truck and headed inside, question still stammering in the air. Kiyoko waited patiently as they walked, letting Iwaizumi think. It wasn't like he was completely oblivious to his own life that he couldn't identify that he and his partners had hit a few issues that he'd most likely been projecting onto his face unknowingly, but it was the fact that they were all so jumbled together, weaving themselves so intricately that it was difficult to pick them apart and deal with them separately. What scared him the most was that there were some that were clearly there, yet parts were hidden away from his view, out of his reach to help.

If he knew he was being so obvious about it he definitely would have tried harder to maintain a passive face. He briefly wondered what _exactly_ his face looked like.

"I don't really know what to tell you," he finally said as they reached the locker rooms, stopping in place. Kiyoko maintained a look of impassiveness, nodding along to indicate she was listening. Iwaizumi sighed. She was good at this. "Things are a little… vulnerable right now? I'm not sure if that's the right word, but yeah…" he trailed off.

"Wait, is this about Oikawa-kun and Kageyama-kun?" Iwaizumi nodded, a little shamefully. Kiyoko pursued her lips in thought, leaning against the wall. "I think with any relationship there'll be times when it feels like that, but that doesn't mean it's anything bad. I don't exactly know what 'vulnerable' means in your context, but I'm sure if it's enough of an issue to have a face like that–" she pointed a finger at Iwaizumi's face, set in a firm sculpture of calculation, "–all the time, then I would guess that they feel it too. Talk to them," she finished. 

Iwaizumi was a little taken back by the unbridled simplicity Kiyoko had chiseled his plethora of worries down to. Was it really that simple? It seemed too easy given the brewing intensity of his thoughts, constantly berating him for not knowing how to fix, well… _this_ – _everything_. For Oikawa and Kageyama, he just wanted nothing more than to give them the world, but right now he felt as if he could barely offer them clarity or stability let alone anything on his grand scale. He just wanted to give them everything he could. But what if that wasn't enough?

Suddenly, he felt too exposed in front of Kiyoko, as if she could read his circling thoughts. She was way too good at this and in that moment, Iwaizumi wasn't sure if he liked it.

"Yeah, I mean we'll get through this, we always do. Thank you." He maybe wanted to reconsider taking back wanting to see his own face considering the smile he was trying to pull most likely conveyed nothing short of grisly.

Considering the man in front of her for a second, Kiyoko pushed off the wall, fixing Iwaizumi with a soft gaze. "If you need to talk, you know where I am." 

Iwaizumi truly was grateful he found a friend in Kiyoko. 

Feeling just a tad bit lighter as he turned to the male locker rooms, Iwaizumi threw over his shoulder, "of course. I'll come find you stealing all the pocky from the vending machine on the second floor. I know it's you!"

Kiyoko's hearty laugh followed her into the female rooms, echoing a distant _"asshole"_ as the door closed. 

Iwaizumi was swift in changing out of his gear, the grumble of his stomach motivating him more than the heaviness of the fabric. It was a little past lunch, but he supposed he was lucky he was even having lunch at all due to the spontaneous aspects of his job, often having to either consume it well into the afternoon that it became pointless or just ramming a protein bar down his throat on the move. 

There were a few people in the break room when he entered, settling his cup of instant noodles on the counter while he waited for the water in the kettle to boil. 

The mild chatter of the room was private enough that Iwaizumi wouldn't be prone to over-hearing any conversations murmured in the confines of the walls. The switch of the kettle flicked and Iwaizumi quickly yet carefully poured water into the cup, giving the softening noodles a stir before bringing them over to the table. He spotted a newspaper sat so tempting idly on the surface next to him, the crossword glaring at him. 

Huffing, Iwaizumi pushed it away and stabbed into his cup. He'd never forgive Kiyoko if he couldn't look at a crossword the same way again.

His one on one time with his food was pointedly interrupted by the entry of another member of his squad –Kyoutani– who hadn't joined them on the callout, sauntering into the room with a rather delicious looking box of pastries that put his sad noodles to shame. 

"Where did you get them?" Iwaizumi inquired, Kyoutani wasn't exactly the kind of person to go out and buy delicate confectionaries for himself– or anyone else for that matter.

The bleached blonde scraped the chair adjacent to Iwaizumi out before seating himself, opening up the box. "One of your friends was looking for you to give you these," he shrugged. 

"So you just took the box and left them?" Iwaizumi set him with a bored look. Kyoutani only shrugged yet again. "Who was it?" He asked rather defeatedly as he rose in his seat, dusting off his trousers instinctively and fully prepared to go and greet whoever it was that came to see him. 

"The one who always looks grumpy."

Iwaizumi snorted, "that's rich coming from you." 

Kyoutani paused in his bite to scowl at the other man, only strengthening Iwaizumi's smirk. He was about to rush out to catch the mystery person in case they were going to leave –having an inkling of an idea as to who it was based on the description– before said mystery was promptly solved by the newcomer making his way in. 

As he entered, Kageyama vigorously glowered at the open box on the table before moving it to man chomping down on the pastries. 

Caught in a stare off, Kageyama didn't notice Iwaizumi saddling up beside him until they were shoulder to shoulder. 

Doing a poor job of making his amusement, Iwaizumi asked, "Kyoutani, why did you not let Tobio in?" It wasn't as if Kageyama had never visited Iwaizumi at the station before. Granted he hadn't interacted with many people besides Iwaizumi, but he was a familiar face and people knew they were associated with each other. Iwaizumi knew for a fact that Kyoutani knew that.

Kyoutani moved his glare from Kageyama over to Iwaizumi, possibly not even realising it was on his face. "He was being shady."

"How so?" 

"He brought you these things and they're all heart shaped and shit. It's weird."

Out of the corner of his eye, Iwaizumi could see a light blush spread across Kageyama's cheeks. He'd make sure to bring _that_ up later. 

"It's more cute than it is shady," Iwaizumi mused, a little embarrassingly after hearing the words in his own voice. 

Kyoutani paused in his bite to mouth 'cute?' to himself as if it was a mystery of the universe he was expected to solve. It was only then that Iwaizumi was drawn back to how his co-worker had referred to Kageyama.

Realisation pooled in Iwaizumi's eyes.

"Kyoutani… you do know that Tobio and I are _together_... right?" The instant widening of eyes and drop of the jaw was the best answer Iwaizumi could have been given. He barked out a laugh, "Kyou, how long have you been here? What, two years? That whole time you thought we were just friends?" 

Kyoutani stuttered for an answer, whipping his head between Iwaizumi and a very pleased Kageyama, who was feeling as if karma was serving a little bit of justice. 

"Wait!" The blonde bit out suddenly, "I thought you were with that irritating tall guy who comes in here and eats all our Kit-Kats." 

Iwaizumi huffed out another laugh. Perhaps if he wasn't in such a joyous daze, he would have considered his next words more carefully, "I'm with him as well." 

It was like a sudden bolt to the stomach, chest tightening so so tight, he was afraid if he tried to breathe, it would only result in a gasping breath. So he just stood there, reminiscently paralysed while regret sliced at his spontaneous confession. 

Petrifying anticipation shortly followed.

Not everyone was so understanding and accepting of their relationship and it usually didn't bother him anymore considering everyone who proved they mattered had stuck by their sides, but he liked Kyoutani and he really didn't want to lose him to bullshit ideologies that stated having one partner was the only acceptable path of life. The words 'greedy' and 'unnatural' had been thrown at them countless times before, and it made his gut churn at the thought of those words being spat out of Kyoutani's mouth. 

Having thought the man already knew, he never thought he'd have to experience this turmoil with him. It relaxed him knowing Kyoutani had never brought attention to his relationship, treating him the same as everyone else, but now it all just made sense. The tiniest bud of hope at knowing for a fact Kyoutani wasnt homophobic and generally didmt take an interest in other's relationships was being muffled by an intense desire to just be treated the same.

The blonde was flickering between the two men in front of him, eyebrows taught with intensity, trying to piece together what had been laid out before him. 

The silence stretching between the three of them was deafening. Iwaizumi didn't even know when the rest of the break room had cleared out leaving only them. He heard Kageyama swallow a shaky breath besides him as he hooked a pinky around Iwaizumi's; an unspoken promise in the action.

_I'm here with you. I'll always be here._

Kyoutani –who seemed completely oblivious to the inner turmoil clattering around the hearts of the men in front of him– slouched back in his seat, huffing and muttering something along the lines of, _"that's not fair"_.

It was clear the mumbling had meant to be kept to himself, but having his senses heightened in his state of rising fight or flight, Iwaizumi's ears caught it puzzlingly.

It took a minute for him to really comprehend what Kyoutani had meant by that, but when he did, he could not for the life of him stop the grin growing on his face. It wasn't like he really wanted to anyway.

"Is Kenny jealous that I have two partners and he doesn't even have one?" He tilted his head to the side innocently. He felt like a child, but god did it feel good. 

"No! I'm not interested in that shit!" Kyoutani exclaimed in a voice that was a little too high and a little too loud to sound believable. He pointed an accusatory finger towards Iwaizumi. "You're the one who started that damn nickname," he continued, suspiciously breaching into a new topic entirely. "Everyone's been calling me that and it's fucking annoying."

"If you asked nicely I'm sure we could find someone to set you up with to help relieve your frustrations." 

Kageyama had a front row seat to observe the effects of having grown up with Oikawa Tooru will have on a man. 

"Screw you!" Kyoutani promptly scampered out of the room, biting into a pastry which oozed out a jam that matched the colour of his ears perfectly. 

Iwaizumi held his stomach as he laughed, his partner besides him at least having the courtesy to muffle his snickers behind his hand.

"Thank god Oikawa isn't here, I know exactly what he'd say to that."

"That's my job!" They both mimicked in unison, sharing a few more straggling laughs before finally calming down.

"He looked pretty pissed. Is he gonna be okay to work with?" Kageyama asked, taking a seat previously occupied by Kyoutani while Iwaizumi reclaimed his own. 

Iwaizumi waved him off, "he'll be fine. I know someone at the police station who won't mind bringing the dogs over to visit. He won't be able to stay too mad after that. Although I should probably tell him that it was Bokuto who started that nickname, I'm certainly not gonna be taking the brunt of the blame for that one." The back to his chair creaked from the sudden weight of Iwaizumi's back rocking back against it. A heavy puff of air expelled from his throat. "I was so scared." Hands dragged down his face as the tidal weight rippled away from his shoulders.

Kageyama hummed next to him, equally as familiar with the feeling. He pushed the box of pastries (what was left of them anyway) towards Iwaizumi, who took one gratefully, incomparable noodles forgotten. 

"Thank you, for these I mean. Any certain occasion?" A flush of hot panic tingled the nerves on his neck at the thought that he may have forgotten an important date or anniversary, quickly vanishing in a concealed sigh of relief as Kageyama shook his head.

"The bakery near the restaurant had this promotional thing going on so I thought I'd bring some over to you." Iwaizumi couldn't help but fawn over the light blush that returned. "They only had them in all lovey-dovey shapes though so that wasn't on purpose," he grumbled, like a romantic gesture such as that was something to be embarrassed about.

Iwaizumi smiled. "I appreciate it. Someone's gonna be a bit jealous that he missed out on these though."

Kageyama scoffed, "as if I'd be so stupid to not get him some as well, I dont have a death wish." Iwaizumis choked on his bite as he chuckled. Kageyama continued as he gave his partner's back a few hard thumps. "Your work is just closer so I thought I'd drop it in on my lunch break. He'll get his later." 

Iwaizumi nudged the box back over to Kageyama in a silent offering, but the younger politely declined, stating he couldn't stay for long. 

Quiet munching and the soft tapping of Kageyama's fingers against the table soon melted into casual conversation, planning meals and grocery trips and whatnot. A few of Iwaizumi's colleagues filtered in, exchanging mannered greetings before leaving the two alone again. There was just an undying flutter Iwaizumi would get whenever either Kageyama or Oikawa dropped by unprompted. It was a little more difficult for him to return the gesture due to the unpredictability of his job, but it wasn't exactly something he could control and the other two were completely understanding of that.

As Iwaizumi walked Kageyama to the lobby, he caught a glimpse of Kyoutani not-so-subtly ducking into a random room as he rounded the corner only to see them walking down towards him. 

Watari was loitering in the lobby, to whom Kageyama promptly bowed lightly to. "Thank you for letting me go up, Watari-san." Now that did solve a question Iwaizumi had been pondering for a while as to how Kageyama got into the staff quarters of the building considering Kyoutani clearly didn't let him in. 

Tapping Kageyama's shoulder to prompt him to straighten up again, Watari shook his head, "that's okay Kageyama-kun, anytime." He turned to Iwaizumi, "by the way, what the hell did you say to Kenny? He's been walking around, grumbling to himself about 'Iwaizumi and his stupid boyfriends' since he came storming in here," Watari quoted in a voice that didnt resemble Kyoutani in the slightest, but clearly far too amused to care for details.

"I'll tell you later," was all Iwaizumi replied with and Watari just laughed, eyes suddenly glimmering. 

"By the way, since I was such a wonderful person and let Kageyama-kun up, it would be human decency to at least let me have–"

"There's one left in the box. If you run you'll probably be able to get it before the vultures swoop in," Iwaizumi interrupted, and Watari –not having to be told twice– bid him thanks before sprinting off towards the break room. 

"Oh! I've got plans on Sunday so I'll be going to the gym on Saturday instead, so I won't be going with you guys. Don't miss me too much!" And with those parting words, Watari was gone. 

Iwaizumi shook his head at his colleague's antics, an idea fluttering together. 

Iwaizumi turned back to Kageyama as they walked to the main door. "Do you…' he started hesitantly as Kageyama was about to leave. The younger paused in his step halfway out of the door, looking back to Iwaizumi curiously. "Do you wanna, maybe join us… at the gym this week?" The offer was caught in the air that shifted the atmosphere of a pleasant departure into a frosty exchange. 

Kageyama looked away as he answered, "no thank you," continuing on his way before Iwaizumi's voice –a fraction of desperation bleeding through– caught his feet again. 

"You don't have to do anything at our level, just come. Please." 

Kageyama didn't bother to turn around and consider his partner, having already heard the request countless times before. It was an easy answer. "No," he repeated with a tone of finality. 

Iwaizumi swallowed, mind flashing to his earlier conversation with Kiyoko. Maybe talking would help.

"Tobio… is your ba–"

"It's fine," Kageyama finally snapped, his ragged breaths audible even to Iwaizumi. The door handle held the brunt of Kageyama's tightening grip before letting go, keeping his back to Iwaizumi as he parted with, "I'll see you at home." 

As the door swung shut, Iwaizumi could feel the physical distance of his partner's retreating figure through the glass, morphing into something far more mentally concerning. 

He couldn't help them, that's all his mind could pad his brain with. What good was he in a relationship if he couldn't take even the slightest ounce of burden off of his partner's? He only seemed to add to it for god's sake. 

For Oikawa and Kageyama, they deserved the best, and Iwaizumi was no longer sure if he could give that to them, but fuck if he had never loved something as much as he loved those two. 

God he loved them, so damn much, but was he being selfish? Tethering them down to him because he could never give them up, not in a million years would he ever even consider it. 

Everything they go through, they go through together; that was such a grounding element to their relationship they had promised each other so many times in the past, yet now, that once open door now split into three, each slowly closing on their own accord. 

_"It's fine"_ , he'd heard both Kageyama and Oikawa utter those two words far too many times for them to hold any semblance of effort. It was an automatic response, holding no truth nor no lies, just nothing, and for once… just once, Iwaizumi wanted those words to hold an inkling of emotion to them so he could jam his foot in those closing doors. 

Standing lifelessly in the lobby, Iwaizumi felt an unrelenting hopelessness rip away at his heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do really appreciate if you actually read all this, like I know it's long and patchy and probably really bad but I just love writing about these boys so much even if I cant do it all that well. Just imagine it's written really well y'know.
> 
> ALSO, I'm absolutely in love with firefighter Kiyoko. I was gonna have here as a doctor with Oiks to help nudge him along in his story, but I just loved the idea of her as a firefighter too much not to do it. 
> 
> Also I love Kyoutani so much as well, like this chapter is not Kyoutani slander I swear I just think iwa would rile him up. 
> 
> Anyway, thank you guys very much, I really appreciate you reading and I hope you liked it Xxx


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